October 9, 2008

Amber and her childhood friends

I know some of you expected me to post every day but if I did I think you would have found it very boring. I thought about sharing my daily feelings and then decided maybe not. I have had some down days but mostly good ones. Also while Amber was here I focused my energy on my family. It was such a pleasure to have her here and I'm looking forward to her Xmas visit too.

I sought out a second opinion for my cancer treatment. Boy, was it a shock to find out how much it would cost. He was going to treat very aggressively with drugs that wouldn't be covered by our provincial medical plan. I had to seek prior approval from my work plan and to date still haven't heard back. Needless to say the costs were prohibitive for our income level. One medication would have cost $86/day and I would have to be on it all my life if it worked for me. Another chemo drug would have cost $30,000 a month or $1000/day. Although he gave us some hope he could relieve my symptoms fairly quickly we felt that there were too many unanswered questions (he spent 15 minutes with us), too far to travel for treatment and it was taking too long for paperwork to be processed. I just wanted to get on with it. The good news is that some of drugs will be available to me if needed at the Cancer Agency at no cost. So I think it was good exercise to get the second opinion because I learned so much in the process and felt I had more control over and information about my treatment options.

I started chemo this past Monday. It was originally scheduled to start on Oct 22 but since my breathing got worse I was wait listed to start earlier.

Apprehension and nervousness accompanied me to the Cancer Clinic for my first treatment. It wasn't nearly as bad as I had anticipated. When we arrived home after the treatment Hoppy noticed that I was quite energetic. As a matter of fact for the next couple of days I felt better in terms of energy and breathing than I had for ages. I thought, "Oh my, chemo sure acts quickly!" I did so much. Made bread, apple sauce, organized closets, went shopping for clothes (lost a lot of weight) and groceries, organized binders and still had energy to burn. The day before my chemo I couldn't walk 1/2 block without having to turn back home so this was like heaven to me. I was told to expect that the anti-nausea medication could disturb my sleep but I wasn't told that the steroids would make me a speed freak. I got that information from a cancer survivor friend. So on his advice I'm taking advantage of the energy while I can to do the things that I enjoy doing.

So far no nausea and my appetite is good. My treatments should be finished by mid- December. It is a 21 day cycle for four months. Day 1 - 2 drugs, Day 8 - 1 drug, Day 21 check in with Dr.

Thanksgiving is this weekend and it will be the first time that I haven't cooked turkey dinner since I was 18 years old. It will be fun to watch and enjoy my family cooking together.

Wishing all of you a wonderful Thanksgiving. I feel all of the positive energy you are sending my way. I am so fortunate to have such fabulous friends and I cherish each and everyone of you and wish all of you were closer so that I could hug you.

PS Wish I were in Caper Breaton for the Celtic Colours!! Next year.

Signing off for now,

Alayne

September 2008

Hello Folks,

I've decided that I would create a blog to keep everyone up to date with my progress and all of the Keough/Hopgood comings and goings. It will also give me a space to share and express my feelings/thoughts/ramblings and rants.

I'll start off with a picture of Hoppy and I on our 33rd wedding anniversary. We went to a local restaurant and had an absolutely wonderful meal. Since I am only eating local and organic we chose Bishop's, whose owner, John is the pioneer of the local and organic dining scene in Vancouver. Basically he's been doing it forever.

As many of you know my father passed away while we were in Nova Scotia on vacation. It was not entirely unexpected and he died just the way he wanted to, peacefully in his sleep in his home with two of his children with him. Unfortunately I didn't get to see him before he passed.

Dad's passing changed the focus of our trip and we spent more time on the move than we had planned. This did slow down my recovery from the radiation but I didn't realize that until we arrived back in BC. One real big bonus was that I got to spend 5 days with my children, two of them at the cottage we rent in Ingonish. I also saw a lot of my relatives and many old friends at my Dad's wake and funeral service.

It was a shock to my system to arrive back in Vancouver. After being so social for three weeks it was an adjustment to be on my own. Hoppy was back to work so I was spending my days by myself. After three days I felt myself falling into a depression and decided that I really didn't want to go there. I forced myself to get out and see friends in the neighbourhood, start baking again even if I couldn't eat it. As my friend Joanne says, "Motion is lotion". In any event I'm feeling much better now and there are more good days than bad. My energy is mostly up and I don't have to take a nap every day. I have lost more weight but it is mostly due to radiation and a change of diet (no sugar).

My eye oncologist said that the mass behind my eye has shrunk and I'll see her again in December for another checkup. My radiation oncologist says that they just don't know what lies ahead for me at this time. I had a CT scan on Tuesday (yesterday) and I see my medical oncologist next week for those results and to find out whether or not chemo is recommended. I will also be seeking a second opinion and am exploring alternate treatments and trials.

I have a new naturopath who is also an oncologist. It may be a coincidence but I feel so much better after seeing him and taking the supplements he prescribed.

It is difficult not to be getting up each day and going to work but I am starting to develop a new rhythm for myself. It helps that the weather has been so sunny....and Amber is coming to visit . Yahoo!!!!!

Friends, if you want to respond to me you can do it either here where it is very public or email me at my home email. I must thank so many of you for all of the support you have given me so far. I love all of you so much and think of you often.

Until my next post,

Alayne